Missing comes in waves.

Missing comes in waves

Love turned to anger

Anger turns to love again

It’s a cycle I admit,

But until it rotates, I know there’s hope of something left.

The endings are deceptive

They tell you nothing about the beginnings we made

They don’t tell of every slipped conversation into reckless adulting

They don’t tell how we almost healed each other’s “something we didn’t break”

I keep going through every paragraph, every text

Every voice note,

Even last seen and last said

That could help me grasp

Reasons to what went wrong

And some night (which is most)

It’s just a pill to help sleep come along.

People say you seek closure you’ll never get

I say closure is for dysfunctional things

How do I break something that was never broken to begin with?

How could something so peaceful bring so much chaos it’s wake?

You said it would be hard but we should end it

Why are we opting for hard endings

When it’s so easy to be together with.

Did we take things for granted?

Did we take fate and twist it?

Was it just the calm before the storm

Or am I just cursed to never be happy

Or be but never for too long.

How could this be the end

This was never the plan

(Or was it for you?)

The unfairness of it dawns on me every day.

Silence must be louder than words

Because for the first time no-one’s talking

Yet the past screams into my ears

Things I could’ve, would’ve, should’ve said before.

Yet that rational voice whispers –

You cannot make people stay

When they don’t want to stay.

Somewhere only we know / Keane